Thursday, August 14, 2008

Movies to Watch Down the Shore

I love "Top 10 Lists". And I love to make my own top 10 lists of things I like. But, truth is I don't always have ten and I also have trouble putting them in a favorite order. That being said,  no other "title" really works. "Gene's Top _______ list" is lame. "Top 5 or 6" is even lamer so here is my Top 10 Movies to Watch Down the Shore, except it's not 10 but it is in order. And I do love going to the shore in the summer.


Ok, it's not great but good beach scenes.


Dudley Moore, Bo Derek. Isn't this a natural choice? I don't know why except I remember Dudley Moore falling down a cliff onto the beach and of course the famous Bo Derek running scene. This just evokes summer to me. Probably because I saw it while sneaking to my neighbors and they were watching it on HBO during the summer. I was definitely young and remember it was the first time where I comprehended how a girl could be "hot". I didn't think Bo Derek was pretty like some of the girls in my 2nd grade class but I understood that whatever she was, that term I would hear my older brothers say ("hot") just seemed to work.


This came out in the 80s and was so bad it was good. A horrible being beneath the sand was pulling people under and killing them. I think the tag line was something like "This summer you won't make it to the water" with an obvious reference to JAWS. Cheesy 80s Horror and It also had "Paulie" from Rocky.


This is like the Karate Kid goes surfing. Actually shouldn't The Karate Kid be on this list too? I mean they do have that beach party. Plus Macho Machio kicks the soccer ball around on the beach with Elizabeth Shue. Ok so back to North Shore, It's a classic. Kid comes to Hawaii from Arizona thinking he's a surfer and ready for the North Shore. He has a lot to learn and luckily gets an apartment or room right next to a Miyagi sort of dude, I mean a true "soul surfer". This Guru teaches him the real ways of the North Shore. Plus Nia Peebles is in the movie and how about this for a bonus- she has a song on the soundtrack too. Watchout.


see above. I convinced myself


I think this started the whole philosophy that sequels are never as good as the original. But this one was so close. I can picture some big Hollywood executives sitting in a room brainstorming how to make JAWS 2 better. Obviously the natural conclusion was to have "more shark" and more shark "killings", which they did. But I love that someone thought. "How can we make the monster scarier?, I got it , lets scatter him with gruesome burn scars" So they added the big explosion scene to give JAWS a messed up face. Now Amity Island is not only being stalked by a giant killer shark but a giant killer shark with burn trauma. Classic ! I am a huge JAWS anything fan. (I've even seen JAWS: The Revenge, aka JAWS 4, a million times) So i've decided to put a top 10 within a top 10. I know brilliant, right.


10 - There's no Hooper so there's way too much of Deputy Hendricks.

9 - Littlest Brody kid, Sean, was a little gay in JAWS 2.

8 - The scene of Shark Fin "heading towards the island" (Spielberg would have never shot that).

7 - Miss Amity, "Tina" was in way too many scenes. She saw the boat blow up, found the dead whale carcass, JAWS eats her Bo, She goes in shock. Can't someone else have some fun.

6 - Too much Chief Brody "Looking Out to the Ocean Like I'm Going to Get You JAWS" Scenes. (I think there is at least 3)

5 - JAWS eating the Helicopter might have gone too far.

4 - The helicopter pilot who got eaten looked like he was Amish.

3 - Cable Junction (WTF is Cable Junction and it looked like something from a miniature golf course.)

2 - Brody says "say Ahh" to JAWS as he shoves electrical cable into his mouth. Man that was a long cry from "smile you son of a bitch" in the first movie.

1 - Quint was killed in JAWS 1.


It's simple, the bar in the movie is the greatest fisherman's shore bar. The movie is ok but the bar gets this puppy on this list.


BobCat Goldthwait, Demi Moore, John Cusak, the guy from the Twister Sister videos and Animal House, an ugly red-headed kid and a dog with a lampshade plus it takes place on the isle of Nantucket, the epitome of being at the shore. (In Jersey we say "down the shore").

Hoops McCann (John Cusack) like Demi Moore, who's a rock singer. Except the lip syncing is so obviously not her. Hoops' arch enemy, some blond haired dude who was in a lot of those movies, has a dad that wants to destroy a house or bar and probably build condos. Actually I don't even know if I have the plot right but who cares. The movies involves an epic sailing race to save something and has a lot of really weird scenes and characters that didn't really need to be there but are brilliant. There's some cartoon montages too because Hoops is trying to get into Art School Only 1 flaw - WHY NO SEQUEL? Come on !! "Another Crazy Summer" is a natural. It would involve new characters too. My thought was a skinny bearded kid who always wears neon swimming goggles and funny shirts with sayings on them. (like "preserving my body in alcohol for science") No reason but I just think it would fit in great.


I know everything there is too know about this film. I am definitely and expert in JAWS Trivia. Who was the kid eaten on the raft? - Alex Kitner. Who's boat to they find in the see - Ben Gardner. How many people does JAWS eat? - well I have to count. While the original movie is clearly the best I can still put the other 3 on this list too. Yes, even the fourth one. They could come out with JAWS Meets Harry and the Hendersons and I would still go see it. (BTW he ate 5 people and 1 dog) The first film is one of my favorite films and a must when you are at the shore. There is nothing like swimming out in the ocean as far as you can and then starting to think about JAWS and have to high tail back to the beach.

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